| HeraldNet - Snohomish County's online news source |
 TUESDAY, JANUARY 6, 2009 4:00 pm |
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• We've got a solution for everything January 6 • How 'bout them M's? January 5 • Celebrating a whole new epoch January 4 • Question of the day January 3 • The stormclouds of 2008 January 2 |
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We've got a solution for everything The Buzz is suggesting ways to kill two birds with one stone today. Problem: Seattle has started using salt on city streets when it snows, but is concerned about the harm to fresh-water streams. Problem: An Oregon town says it's overrun by black-tail deer because residents are feeding them. Solution: Salt the streets but have each Seattle family adopt a deer that can then be sent out to use the roads as salt licks. Problem: Tim Eyman is back with yet another initiative. Problem: The Milky Way galaxy is more massive than first thought, which may hasten its collision with the Andromeda galaxy. Solution: Eyman's enlarged ego soon will collapse on itself, creating a black hole that will restore balance to the universe. Problem: Sales are down drastically for automakers. Problem: The health-care industry is desperate for nurses. Solution: Retrain the nation's unemployed car sales work force as nurses. Just don't let your nurse talk you into the undercoating when you go in for a colonoscopy. ... [Read More] E-mail | Print | Comment NEW!
How 'bout them M's? The Mariners have three months and one day before the start of their next season. Kirby Arnold explains that they still have three big items on their to-do list. We'd like to add an item. No 4. Give Seattle sports fans a reason to live again. Please. Elementary, my dear Watson. Two experts are trying to get to the bottom of a baffling tree mystery. Reading about it, we can't help but think fondly of Sherlock Holmes or maybe "CSI." In this case, though, at least the victims and witnesses can't run away -- and none of the suspects are carrying guns. All of the thrill with none of the danger. Well, except those low-hanging branches. It's gonna be a bumpy ride. Dungeness Spit drivers are a hardy bunch. In all weather, they make the 5.5-mile drive to the lighthouse. Lately they've been making the expedition in deep snow that makes it hard to see what's going on. "There could be boulders or even a seal underneath, and you might not know it," one driver said. New resolution: Stop complaining about the commute unless it includes the need to dodge a snow-covered seal. ... [Read More]
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Celebrating a whole new epoch Guess what? Not only is it a new year, it's a new epoch, or so scientists from the Geological Society of London have decided. If only we'd known, we'd have made more impressive resolutions than remembering to dust on a quarterly basis. Does turning pages count as exercise? If you've resolved to get in shape for the new epoch, one of three fitness books may help. A fourth option: "War and Peace." It may not provide advice about diet and exercise, but lugging Tolstoy's tome around for the length of time it will take to read it is sure to burn off a few pounds. If you've ever proclaimed hatred for weeds, you should avoid Switzerland, lest you someday end up on trial for defaming a dandelion. A federal panel has declared that plants are entitled to respect and it's morally wrong to kill them unnecessarily. However, the declaration is probably popular among Swiss children, who now have government backing in their effort to avoid eating their vegetables. According to Starwatch, the name of Betelgeuse, a star in the constellation Orion, loosely translates to "armpit of the great one," more or less guaranteeing Betelgeuse will never be a center of intergalactic tourism. ... [Read More]
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Question of the day From this year's Great American Think-Off in Minnesota: "Is it ever wrong to do the right thing?" While you ponder the answer, here are a couple other things to think about: Tired of that same old boring trip to the beach? Travel guru Rick Steves can take you on that vacation to Iran you've always dreamed about. Steves says Americans can feel perfectly comfortable in Iran. Just don't try to order a gin and tonic, and always remember to tell people you're Canadian. While you're in Tehran, don't miss the Shahr-e Bazi amusement park. The "death to America" T-shirts are overpriced, but the martyrdom ride is a scream. No takesies-backsies: Alaska celebrates its 50th anniversary as a U.S. state today. As per tradition, many Alaskans will mark the occasion by bathing in pure crude oil, then asking the federal government to build them something ridiculous. And as for today's philosophical question, the answer is, "Wait, the Great American Think-Off takes place in the state that can't choose a senator?" ... [Read More]
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Picture this. Herald photographers take a look back at some of the highlights of 2008. The Buzz would also like to sum up 2008 with a photo. Z2K. Some Zune owners found out the toy was useless on New Year's Eve. Something about the calendar broke it. "I don't know the technical details beyond that," a spokesman said. "I just know it didn't function yesterday." While there may not be a clear explanation of the problem, there is a fix. Drain the battery, recharge and restart the Zune. While you're waiting for that process to finish, go buy an iPod. High-flying. A woman gave birth to a baby girl while in an airplane over Canada. When the plane landed, the woman and her baby were taken to the hospital, after the mother stopped to pay the airline's fee for the additional passenger. Still to be determined is the baby's nationality, American, Canadian or Northwest Airlines. ... [Read More]
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And take the Gremlins, too: The French government is demanding that a Seattle man hand over a 1919 Turcat-Mery touring car, once owed by an heir to the French throne, that it has declared a national treasure. The owner is agreeable but wants to be reimbursed the $927,000 he paid for it. As part of the agreement, France must also repatriate every AMC Le Car still running in the U.S. -- both of them. Mush! Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, R-Not Tina Fey, is refuting reports that her son-in-law-designate, Levi Johnston, is a high school dropout. Not true, Palin said; he's taking a correspondence course. The reason it appeared Johnston wasn't currently enrolled in high school was that he was waiting for his textbooks to arrive by sled-dog team. It was that cold: It might usually escape the notice of readers, but The Herald often runs a list of budget expenditures by local governments. We draw your attention to the $63.13 spent by the city of Snohomish recently for "galvanized nipples." The Buzz thinks Snohomish could have easily waited for the recent cold snap to do the job and save itself the $63.13. ... [Read More]
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Our New Year's resolutions We'll take a cup of kindness yet: The Buzz is jotting down our new year's resolutions, with some prodding from today's news. And a glass of pinot noir: The one bright spot in the state revenue picture in 2008 was receipts from state liquor stores, which increased 6 percent over the previous year. The Buzz resolves to continue to contribute fully to the state coffers and stands at the ready with a corkscrew. Whiskers on kittens: A Zogby poll says that at the stroke of midnight tonight, more of us will kiss a pet to ring in the new year than a fellow human. The Buzz resolves to kiss more animals in the new year, and further resolves that this time we'll ask their owners. You're a mean one, Mr. Greenwich: The world's timekeepers at the Royal Observatory at Greenwich, England, say that a leap second will be tacked on to 2008 to keep everyone's digital watches aligned with a slight slowing in the Earth's rotation. The Buzz resolves to use that extra second well, and not to waste it on meaningless pursuits and needless drivel. Oops. Too late. ... [Read More]
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Stamp act: The U.S. Postal Service has announced a series of 20 stamps to be released in August that honors the Golden Age of Television with images from "I Love Lucy," "Dragnet" and more. Which means that in 50 years we can look forward to stamps that honor the Golden Age of YouTube with images of Nora, the Piano-Playing Cat; the "Chocolate Rain" guy; and that wiggy kid who screams "Leave Britney alone!" What? Say again: Scientists have learned that brain circuitry may be responsible for many adults' faltering ability to tune out distracting noise, as can happen at a cocktail party. At least that's what we think we heard. The newsroom is so noisy these days. Jenny Craig, 98270: The Snohomish Health District has updated its chart of the "fattest ZIP codes" in the county, showing areas where obesity is most prevalent. The intent is to have county residents take stock and make more healthful choices. So, Edmonds, that means we don't want to hear that you've been whispering to Mukilteo about how Marysville's sweat pants make its butt look big. Jon Bauer, Herald Staff ... [Read More]
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Listmania 2008 All the cool kids are making their year-end top 10 lists, including Esquire, NPR and Google. We're afraid they won't let us sit with them at lunch anymore if we don't make a list, too, so here are three suggestions for ending the old year and starting the new: 1) Buy some bubbly for your New Year's Eve festivities. Experts suggest six sparkling wines that are inexpensive but still worth drinking. Their choices go for about $10 each, which means you can spend the rest of your budget on your favorite exotic hangover cure. 2) Clean out the attic. You never know what kind of pests might be lurking up there, as a Pennsylvania family discovered when police found a man living in their attic and wearing their clothes. The man allegedly made a Christmas list describing the items he is accused of stealing. Santa also brought him a couple things not on his list: an orange jumpsuit and a cozy jail cell. 3) Take cooking classes. The Web site rouxbe.com provides video lessons on using knives, making sauces and selecting pasta, among other things. One tip not provided by Rouxbe: How to cover your laptop in a protective layer of plastic wrap in case the lesson goes more explosively than shown in the video. ... [Read More]
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For the last six months -- or at least that's how long it feels like -- we've been driving with the constant fear of becoming intimately acquainted with a snowbank. In the meantime, snowplow owners have been raking it in. Well, you know what they say: "If life gives you snow, make snowplows." An 80-year-old blogger made an apology on her blog after a boost in readership prompted by a story in her local paper. She apologized to doctors, dogs, cats, Pepsi-Cola drivers, people who live in the Arctic and Wal-Mart's Web site, among others. (We like her already.) Given her excellent example, The Buzz has a few apologies of its own. We humbly apologize to Canadians, Subaru drivers, the Big Three, Keanu Reeves, Microsoft, the Mariners, the Seahawks and any public official who has been arrested in an airport restroom. We resolve to look on the bright side. Today we look ahead to 2009, which will be a year of challenges. On the bright side, though, we now know we can survive snowmageddon, so budget brawls and traffic crawls should be no big thing. ... [Read More]
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Fitness for office Travel guru Rick Steves writes about his visit to Tehran, Iran, where presumably he did not engage in marijuana-decriminalization activism, because he returned to Edmonds alive and with all his extremities intact. In other travel news, skiers have two primary choices in Montana: Big Mountain, a rustic resort, and Big Sky, a posh place where you'll share a chair lift with celebrities. Not so long ago, the only celebrities you'd encounter in Montana were the ones paid to appear at the Great Falls Chrysler-Dodge dealership. As tabloid readers recently noted, President-elect Barack Obama's daily workouts have left him fit for viewing while shirtless at the beach. The Buzz doesn't know whether Obama will prove to be the 21st century version of FDR or a Jimmy Carter for the new millennium, but we do know this: Any 47-year-old man who can doff his duds without fear of ridicule and play full-court basketball without blowing out a knee or slipping on his own vomit is ready to lead on Day One -- at least at the White House gym. Mark Carlson, Herald staff ... [Read More]
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Not even an iPod? It should come as no surprise to those tallying up their Christmas Day haul, but retail sales were down as much as 8 percent overall from last year, sales of luxury goods were down 34.5 percent. I guess that's why Santa stiffed The Buzz and didn't leave the $109,000 2009 Tesla Roadster under the tree. The little blue persuader: The CIA has added a new weapon to its arsenal in the war against terrorism; it's offering Viagra to aging Afghan chieftains who may have useful information about the Taliban. But the side-effects can be brutal; interrogations lasting longer than four hours should be reported to the Afghan grand council. Can I have a hug? A group of Eugene, Ore., high school students is meeting with resistance to its Random Acts of Kindness Club. Mall cops chased them away when they tried to hand out cards of encouragement that said, "Have a nice day" and "You're awesome." And when they tried to rake one woman's lawn they were rebuffed: "Go do your random acts of kindness somewhere else." Then they realized why no one trusted them: They were wearing University of Oregon sweatshirts. Jon Bauer, Herald Staff ... [Read More]
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What is under The Buzz Christmas Tree? A Merry Christmas and -- at the risk of leaving someone's personal beliefs out -- the writers of The Buzz also wish you a Happy Hanukkah, a Festive Kwanzaa and a Grievous Festivus. Here's what's under the tree: License to kill: The New York Department of Motor Vehicles has agreed to issue a retired police officer a license plate that reads GETOSAMA. Meanwhile the Pakistan Department of Motor Vehicles has issued a similar plate to its prime minister that reads GETHIMYOURSELF. Foiled again: Martha Stewart explains today that aluminum foil is not great for storing veggies, unless you use something to line it with . Also, you must emboss the foil with your initials and family crest. What? You don't have a family crest? How uncouth. Schultz! In "Valkryie," Tom Cruise and a bunch of actors with British accents play Nazi officers making a failed attempt to assassinate Adolf Hitler. We think either the British accents gave them away or it was Cruise as Col. Claus von Stauffenberg jumping on Hitler's couch and professing his love for Eva Braun. ... [Read More]
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A Washington, D.C., neighborhood has revived Festivus, the mock holiday made famous by the 1990s sitcom "Seinfeld" (Page A2). For those too young to remember "Seinfeld," or who were watching "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman" instead, the purpose of Festivus is to gather under a drab aluminum pole to air one's grievances. With another freakin' snowstorm bearing down on Snohomish County, Festivus really does seem like the holiday for the rest of us. Let's celebrate with a few weather-related grievances. * The ridges of ice on the roads are shaking my car to pieces. * The snow plow made a pile that blocked my driveway. * I paid $60 for these tire chains, and they broke five minutes after I nearly lost my fingers to frostbite while installing them. * The liquor store hasn't been open since last Thursday. * That jerk in the Subaru thinks he can drive 60 mph. Investigators want to figure out what happened to the $50 billion lost in the Bernard Madoff scandal. They're probing a number of leads, but categorically deny that some of the loot went to Rudy Giuliani's 2008 presidential campaign. ... [Read More]
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A bailout you can swallow A little green on the nose: A San Francisco winery is selling Bailout 2007 for $39 a bottle. But if you buy it now, the winery will cut you a check for $2 for every 100 points the Dow Jones drops between now and Aug. 14. You'll know it's time to panic when you see Warren Buffett buying up hundreds of cases. Oh, what fun it is to drive: Unless you were smart, surrendered to the weather and stayed home like one Tulalip-area family, you joined The Buzz and "The Ice Road Truckers" on the streets the last few days. When we weren't gritting our teeth and clutching our St. Christopher medal, the following occurred to us:
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Dreaming of a white Christmas and white chocolate It's cold outside, and we're trapped indoors with nothing to do but fantasize about Cancun and eat holiday goodies in an effort to give ourselves an extra layer of insulation. Hence our interest in the following food-related tidbits: Eighty-eight pounds of confiscated caviar was given to charities in Italy to serve during Christmas meals for the poor. At some places, people may be served two to four times as much caviar as chefs typically give wealthy diners, which is probably at least two to four times more fish eggs than anyone wants to eat. There are no secret ingredients on Foodista.com, a new online cooking encyclopedia where you can look up and edit recipes. It looks like they've still got a few kinks to work out, though. A search for "meat loaf" brought up a biography of Meat Loaf, the singer. We hear he goes well with a frosty pint of PBR. Alcohol also goes well with cheese, and another Web site, www.cheesecupid.com, helps you find good pairings. The site is run by the Wisconsin Milk Marketing Board, so if you can't fit into your swimsuit next summer, you know who to blame. ... [Read More]
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We'll drink to that A new product called iBreath can turn your iPod into a breathalyzer you can use to give yourself a field sobriety test. Apple intends to make this feature mandatory for anyone trying to buy songs on iTunes off the New Kids on the Block reunion album. If you fail the sobriety test, it might be a good time to try airport karaoke. Travelers at the Houston airport are passing the time singing holiday-themed songs. After long lines, intrusive security screenings and constant flight delays, a few off-key renditions of "Jingle Bells" might be just the thing to cheer you up -- or turn you into Private Pyle at the end of boot camp in "Full Metal Jacket." Columnist David Sirota has a problem with Las Vegas -- and it's not the demise of the cheap buffet. It's the fact that all those glittering lights aren't exactly eco-friendly. After getting cleaned out at the roulette table, Sirota calls Sin City a mirror to a culture of "cataclysmic consumption and hubristic hedonism." We're not sure what all those words mean. All we know is the drinks are free! ... [Read More]
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The National Weather Service warns we're in for a major storm today and Sunday with more snow, freezing temperatures and heavy winds that could bring down trees and power lines. If things get bad enough, the Red Cross said it's prepared to open a shelter within the cozy confines of the parka of KING-TV's Jim Forman. Do you have a li-sauns for your minkee: A French appeals court has ruled that two recently written sequels to the Victor Hugo classic "Les Miserables" do not violate the rights Hugo's family holds to the novel. However, the French court did rule against Steve Martin's 2006 remake of "The Pink Panther" and any further movies featuring Inspector Jacques Clouseau. In the clearing stands a boxer: Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich, D-Deal or No Deal, says he will fight allegations that he attempted to sell the vacated Senate seat of the president-elect. Blagojevich, a former amateur boxer, vowed, "I am not guilty of any criminal wrongdoing." All together now, let's sing the chorus from Simon & Garfunkel's "The Boxer": Lie, lie, lie; lie, lie, lie, lie, lie, lie, lie. ... [Read More]
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Hold the onions: Burger King has launched a new men's spray fragrance, "Flame," which it describes as "the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat." Save yourself the $3.99 and just slap a Whopper under each arm. Ooh, ooh, that smell: Philadelphia, the land of the cheesesteak sandwich, has passed the nation's toughest nutrition labeling law for restaurants, ordering that they display information on fat, calories and more. Restaurants can exempt themselves from the new rules if they inform customers that menu items are for external use only. Rock you like a thunder snow! Our cold and snowy weather is expanding our meteorologic vocabulary. Today's phrase: thunder snow, which, not surprisingly, is thunder followed by snow, a whole lot of snow. The Buzz is currently auditioning musicians for Thundersnow! -- our new Icelandic heavy metal rock band. Members must provide their own instruments and fur-lined Spandex parkas. And bring a list of words that rhyme with "ice scraper." -- Jon Bauer, Herald staff ... [Read More]
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Another kind of change you can believe in Once again, some generous person dropped a gold coin worth $1,000 into a Salvation Army donation kettle. The charity is happy to take a donation in any form, but gifts of blue chip stock will be laundered and put out on the racks for sale with the second-hand clothing and used VHS tapes. OK, but no bowling: Noting that Barack and Michelle Obama's children, Malia and Sasha, are squarely in its demographic, children's network Nickelodeon TV plans to cover the presidential inauguration Jan. 20. And rather than a staid inaugural ball, the Obama family will make a guest appearance on Nick's "My Family's Got Guts," during which parents and sisters will be strapped into bungee cords for a two-on-two game of Sky Slam. They call me Mr. Tibbs: An Associated Press poll says that 67 percent of U.S. pet owners believe they understand their animals' barks and meows. About 83 percent of cats said they understood humans but chose to ignore them because they were still mad about being named Bootsie, Snugglekins or Mrs. Wigglesbottom. ... [Read More]
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That'll be $25,000 Pay to play: A source close to U.S. Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr., D-Not My Dad, said that Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich, D-Hair Club for Sasquatch, denied Jackson's wife a choice state job because he didn't give Blagojevich a $25,000 donation in 2002. Blagojevich's habit of making demands in return for political appointments may go back even further. In return for a prime crossing guard position in fifth grade, Blagojevich demanded a classmate give him a "Gunsmoke" lunch box. Try it with me: President-elect Barack Obama answered questions from grade-school kids in Chicago on Tuesday morning. Vice President-elect Joe Biden joined Obama and entertained the kids by demonstrating how easily he can put his foot in his mouth. Powder envy: We in Western Washington apparently can't even do snow right. Our "Cascade concrete" isn't like the powder snow of the Rocky Mountains. Nope. It's lumpy, blunt and asymmetrical. But then lumpy, blunt and asymmetrical also describes Jim Forman and other Seattle TV reporters bundled up for their nightly "Blizzard Blast '08" reports. ... [Read More]
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Everything must go! Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich's days in power appear to be numbered. So, now's the time to get a good deal on that cushy patronage job you've always wanted. Meanwhile, it's time for Blagojevich to think ahead to his next gig. Hair Club representative at the Illinois state prison is the obvious choice, but here are a few other things he could do: Become a judge on "American Idol": The show is shaking up its format next year. There'll be fewer tryouts and more competition, along with different celebrity judges. Paula Abdul's Coca-Cola cup will continue to be spiked at random intervals. Marry Madonna: The singer settled her divorce by paying her ex-husband at least $76 million. That's 152 times as much money as the highest alleged offer fielded by the governor for a U.S. Senate seat, which sounds about right. Being a senator has to be 152 times easier than being married to Madonna. Take up skydiving: There surely are plenty of people willing to pack Blagojevich's parachute and push him out of the plane. ... [Read More]
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Look out the window. Is it still snowy? Yes? Then you should call work and tell them you're snowed in. Then you can enjoy the traditional snow day entertainment of the Northwest -- watching the TV news to see cars sliding around like toboggans with no steering. How to Have Style. A new book offers advice for regular women on how to step up their style. The author has suggestions for different scenarios, including style on a budget and style while traveling. Wonder if he explains style options while wearing mostly fleece and jeans? That'd go over well in the Northwest. Or he could explain how to pull off an ensemble of two sweaters, a coat, a scarf and a hat. That would come in handy during Snow Globe '08. Elephan-zeb-izard. Here's a gift idea for a creative youngster. Get them a Mythmorphs and let them combine all the various pieces to create their own species of animal. This works equally well for either a future evolutionary biologist or mad scientist. ... [Read More]
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And what do you want for Christmas, little city? He's makin' a list, he's checkin' it twice: Snohomish County cities are hoping that the federal government makes like Santa Claus and delivers a nice fat check, all wrapped up with a shiny bow. And what would that check pay for? Sewage projects and asphalt. We're not sure if that's better or worse than a lump of coal. A journey of 9,500 miles. An Italian man fell just short of his goal of rowing unassisted across the Pacific Ocean. He made if safely to shore with the help of a tug boat. He's now eager to go home. "I miss my bed," he said. We're going to go out on a limb here and say that it's not a water bed. In further news of people doing insane things, we have a story about surfers in Alaska. Yes, Alaska, where the temperature is hovering right around frigid. The surfers came from sunny locales such as Hawaii -- water temperature tepid bath -- to Yakutat Bay -- water temperature ice bath. One knowledgeable observer summed up the experience: "It was really, really cool," he said. And that, dude, is like saying the ocean is a little wet. ... [Read More] E-mail | Print | Comment NEW!
Hooray for Santy Claus: The Experience Music Project and Science Fiction Museum in Seattle offers a special screening Tuesday of "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians," the 1964 cult classic that starred a young Pia Zadora in her acting prime. Dress up like Santa or a Martian to enter a drawing for a free EMP/SFM membership. (Actual Martians, including Zadora and Keanu Reeves, are not eligible for this offer.) Own a piece of history: Even weeks before the inauguration, Washington, D.C., street vendors say souvenirs, including hot sauce, mints and bobble-head dolls with Barack Obama's name and face on them, are in high demand. Should we really be surprised, then, that the Illinois governor would try to sell the Senate seat that had the president-elect's butt in it? And then sell it: Meanwhile, Illinois' attorney general is seeking the ouster of Gov. Rod Blagojevich, D-Craiglist, noting that the scandal has paralyzed state business. Relenting to the pressure, Blagojevich announced late Friday night that he will step down and is now accepting bids for the governor's office. ... [Read More]
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Finally, a role Keanu Reeves can master Role of a lifetime: Keanu Reeves, whose single facial expression is brought to you by the National Forestry Association, is uniquely suited to play the taciturn alien in a remake of "The Day the Earth Stood Still," says Herald film critic Robert Horton. The visitor urges Earthlings to stop global warming, which suggests that Al Gore might have been a fine choice for the leading role. Or perhaps Gore could have played Gort, the alien's menacing robot sidekick. Gore might consider using the 1951 original's spooky soundtrack in his "Inconvenient Truth" slide shows. Nominations for the Golden Globes were announced Thursday. In the curious world of Hollywood, the Golden Globes are a big deal -- even though they are judged by an organization that once named Pia Zadora "new female star of the year" in exchange for a posh junket paid for by Zadora's billionaire husband. Gift idea of the day: Did you know the Snohomish County PUD offers gift certificates? A $25 certificate might as well say: "Good for 20 minutes of heat from the baseboards in your drafty 1971 raised ranch." ... [Read More]
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Some things are priceless; for everything else, there are taxpayers Big Three: $15 billion. Congress and the White House finally settled on a deal with automakers for that amount in emergency loans. The deal almost fell apart, but you know how these things go. You offer $14 billion; they go and pretend to talk to their manager, then come back and ask for $16 billion. You threaten to turn Detroit into a barren wasteland; they offer $15 billion plus free rust-proofing and you've got a deal. Everyone wins, not counting everyone who pays taxes. One search engine: $15 billion. One of Yahoo's biggest shareholders wants to sell off the search engine to Microsoft. He thinks it's worth roughly a third of what Microsoft was willing to pay for the company a few months ago. It's all a reaction to the failure of Yahoo's corporate strategy -- build a time machine, return to 1999 and sell everything for a bajillion dollars. Santa Claus: priceless. In a Whidbey Island play, Santa and his helpers reveal some of his secrets, such as how he delivers so many gifts in one night and how he knows what you want. Santa will not reveal why you caught him half-dressed, wrestling with Mommy that one time. ... [Read More]
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